The Environmental Planning

The Environmental Planning Committee is organising a campaign to make our town more "green". You are invited to submit a proposal related to your neighbourhood. Present some factual information about the area, pointing any relevant environmental issues, and suggest practical measures which individuals and families could take to make the neighbourhood more green.

Write your proposal in 220-260 words.

The Environmental Planning

Introduction
The objective of this proposal is to advocate for alternative ways in which our town can battle pollution and become more “green”.

Save and turn off
“Save and turn off” strategy and way of thinking is not the way of progress and prosperity. It is the way of keeping the status quo.  Fossil fuel consumption that is endangering public health and the environment is a result of series of remarkable inventions and discoveries. Hence the sustainable environmental friendly future without fossil fuels is only possible through innovation and investment in other forms of energy.

Food
Processed food is bad for our health. Even more, production, processing, transportation and storage of processed food has a huge impact on our environment. Individuals and families would buy the local produce, eat fresh food and stop eating processed food if this kind of food was affordable for average income families.

Cars
The area around Inner city lakes here in Copenhagen is widely used for recreational purposes. Huge amount of particles emitted by petrol cars are to blame for at residing in this area for longer periods of time poses as a health risk for individuals. In my opinion, the government should invest in Danish carpark and subsidize for cars, lowering the taxes that keep people from buying newer more environmental friendly cars or electric cars such as Tesla model S.

Natural energy
Affordable solar cell equipment is reserved for house owners. Despite the gray cloudy weather, home owners have been for years able to produce surplus electricity that is led back to the electric net. Solar cell panels on city roofs, balconies and even windows should be a common place in this time and age.

Conclusion
It is up to us to shape the future and contribute to the world we live in. The environmental friendly future is unquestionable the right way to go. Individuals and families are ready to contribute if the means and ways were there to meet.

Teacher's comments:
Persvasive arguments. Excellent vocabulary. Just a few errors. Mostly commas and incorrect word choice. Good job!

Teacher's corrections:

(The) Environmental Planning

Introduction
The objective of this proposal is to advocate (for) alternative ways in which our town can battle pollution and become more “green”.  A good beginning

Save and turn off
The “Save and turn off” strategy and way of thinking is not the way of to progress and prosperity. It is the way of keeping the status quo.  Fossil fuel consumption that which is endangering public health and the environment, is a result of a series of remarkable inventions and discoveries. Hence, the a sustainable environmentally friendly future without fossil fuels is only possible through innovation and investment in other forms of energy. Agreed

Food
Processed food is bad for our health. Even more, production, processing, transportation and storage of processed food has a huge impact on our environment. Individuals and families would should buy (the) local produce, eat fresh food and stop eating processed food - if this kind of food was affordable for average income families. True

Cars
The area around the Inner City lakes here in Copenhagen is widely used for recreational purposes. Huge amount of particles emitted by petrol cars are to blame for the fact that at residing in this area for longer periods of time poses as a health risk for individuals. In my opinion, the government should invest in Danish carparks and subsidize for cars, lowering the taxes that keep people from buying newer, more environmental friendly cars or electric cars, such as, the Tesla model S.

Natural energy
Affordable solar-cell equipment is reserved for house owners. Despite the gray cloudy weather, home owners have been, for years, able to produce surplus  (Good!) electricity that is led back to the electric net. Solar cell panels on city roofs, balconies, and even windows should be a common place in this time day and age.

Conclusion
It is up to us to shape the future, and contribute to the world we live in. The environmentally friendly future is unquestionably the right way to go. Individuals and families are ready to contribute if the means and ways were there to meet be taken advantage of.